An Apology… sort of.

I guess the simplest way to say this, is that I’m sorry (OK I guess this IS an apology) I’m not much of an updater on this site (or at ALL). I thought by signing up, the ideas would flow and I’d be able to write like I used to. And the truth is, I have the ideas, and I put the words to paper, and then… nothing. I get stumped half way through, or I decide it’s not good enough, and because I’m incapable of giving anything less than my absolute best I give up. I’m believe that nothing is ever good enough for the fine people that still swing by to see if I’ve written anything.

All 12 of you…

I want you to know that I love that you still do that. Really. I appreciate it more than you know; and somehow it makes me feel like I’ve let you down.

In which case, if I HAVE let you down.. Free hug next time I see you?

But really, if I’m going to do this, it has to be for me. You know? I’m surrounded by amazing talented writers and bloggers who never cease to come up with the perfect pithy, witty phrase whilst I’m trying to mentally edit out my “umms” and “aahhhs”. Which is bloody intimidating. Even though I love them, their superhuman writing abilities scare the crap out of me. And what MAKES them so intimidating, is that they stay true to themselves. They don’t take crap from anyone. They don’t write for anyone, but themselves. And it shows, in their voice, and the frequency with which they write.

As some know, this past year has been particularly trying for me. It’s been AMAZING. But also very very hard. I’m looking forward to moving forward. Life is never calm, but I’d never felt less in control of it than I did the last year. So, my HOPE is, that while I grow and mature as a person, maybe I can make some progress with the site.

Maybe. No promises.

Just hugs.

6 Things About Myself I think are Important

  1. It's a gooder eh?

    I don’t drive. Like, at all, I don’t have a car and as long as I live in a city with adequate public transportation I fail to see any reason why I should.

  2. I hate tomatoes. Unless it’s a caprese salad. Other than that I have a firm no tomato policy and will pick them out of things, even if they are minced into oblivion.
  3. I have an intense loyalty to three things: Family, friends and Husky Athletics. You trash talk any one of those and you will have me to deal with.
  4. I have a tendency to be a very private person. I’ll give you the “broad strokes” about me, but I don’t care to delve too deep. This is an exercise in moving past that.
  5. I come from a long line of workaholics. You give us a job and we will do it until we have a foot in the grave. I think traveling is my way of providing some balance to my intense work ethic.
  6. When I was 16, I got sick. Really sick. Knocking on heaven’s door, call the Chaplain, sick. For me, it provided the perspective that life is short and there are no guarantees so live the life you want. Looking back though, I can’t imagine what it must have felt like for my parents to watch me wither away. That has to be the scariest experience for a parent.

My Second Home…

No really, that's what they're called: Crazy Mountains.

I have two homes. One is Seattle, which I am hopelessly in love with. Even when I bitch because it’s too hot too cold too gray too wet too liberal and too crowded. My other home is less obvious, the one I’ll only tell you about if I like you. People’s preconceived notions of the place have made me realize that not everyone feels the same way I do.

Montana seems like an unlikely choice. Or maybe not, most people I tell have never been, “but would love to go.” I think it’s the romanticized version of the place that they got from A River Runs Through It. There’s definitely that part to it, but there is so much more.  Every time I go, my eyes are opened to the little things that make Montana an amazing place. People like to think that it’s a little backwater state where everyone carries guns and wears cowboy boots. Those people are sort of right, but it’s like saying all Seattleites listen to NPR and drive VW’s. It’s only part of the story; and not the most important part.

Over my life I’ve made no less than twelve trips out to Montana, I’ve actually lost count. The very first time I went, I “drank the kool-aid”. I even considered transferring to Montana State University, I loved it that much. Driving through the state from Seattle on our way to Bozeman I was like a kid, my nose pressed to the car window, staring at the scenery as it passed. Seeing something you’ve never seen for the first time is bound to make an impression. Up to that point my trips had been mostly urban: London, Paris and San Francisco were my top visits. But as we drove across the vast state, through valleys and mountains with a sky even bigger than they say, I couldn’t help but get lost in the vastness of it.

But that’s only half of Montana’s charm. Beyond the mind blowing natural beauty, is that of the people I’ve met from my repeated trips there. Nowhere else have I been where people come up and want to know why they don’t know you. Not because they’re busybodies, but because they’re genuinely concerned that somehow they’ve failed to become friends with you. Never mind the fact you’ve only been there 15 minutes, and 5 of those have been in line for the bathroom.

One of my favorite examples of how amazing the people are, is from my second trip there. We had driven to Butte, for St Patrick’s Day; and as three college kids we were STOKED. Apparently this was the place to be if you couldn’t make it to Boston, and we were ready to take the town by storm. Storm it we did, we dropped off our stuff at the hotel and hit the streets. Uptown is closed to car traffic, people wandered the streets with open containers, kegs chained to dollies, and more Montana style food carts than you could dream of. (Montana meaning potato and apple sausages and meat pasties, yum!) It was amazing. Sometime during the day, we stopped to take a bathroom break and hit the port-a-potties. Shortly after, I realized I lost my wallet. IN the port-a-potty. There was nowhere else it could be. I was screwed, it was the beginning of our road trip and that wallet had nearly everything in it, save my ID. Naturally, it ruined my night, I had no cash, and even though my friends were more than willing to pay for my cover and drinks, it took the wind out of my sails, and I called it a night fairly early.

The next morning, I woke up to a missed call, and listening to the message I COULD NOT believe what I heard. The woman was from the company who owned the port-a-potties, and this morning they had picked up the toilets, and found my wallet. It had fallen into a small crack at the bottom of the floor, and landed on the ground underneath. She’d grabbed it, and using my student id, looked me up on the student directory, found my number and called. When I called her back, she decided to bring my wallet TO ME. She wouldn’t hear of me coming to find her, wouldn’t take a reward and was just happy she could help. I still, to this day can’t believe how out of her way she went to make sure I got my wallet back. That act of kindness made me realize how lucky we are to have places like that that still exist. People that still value a golden sort of rule and have a kind word or smile for a stranger. It’s a lost commodity in today’s society and that I think that’s part of the reason why I identify so strongly with Montana. We need that positive influence to help keep us afloat in a world of snark and cynicism.

Over the subsequent trips back, my feelings have only solidified about Montana. Going back and forth as many times as I have has afforded me the opportunity to observe what the place is really like. Like anything, you take the good with the bad. But every time I go, I can’t help but leave a little bit more of myself there.


Travel Buddies

“A friend in need is a friend indeed.”

But a friend you can travel with is a friend for LIFE.

I learned this pretty quickly. My first trip. My first time on a plane. I was in the 8th grade going on that rite of passage… Washington D.C. with other 8th graders and my history teacher. Everyone does it. From the moment I stepped on the plane, I was hooked. I LOVED flying. This was going to be awesome. Until my dear friend and hotel roommate found a boy, a cute boy. As I sat on the floor outside my hotel room (locked out), wondering what the hell just happened; I realized something, you can be friends with a lot of people… but you sure can’t travel with all of them.

When you’re young, you don’t get to choose your travel partners. Usually they’re called “mom and/or dad”. But when you’re older, you learn to be more choosey about the people you log hours on planes, in cars and other more questionable modes of transportation with. You have to be on the same wavelength, otherwise, you want to lie on the beach while they want to go hike in the mountains. You want to snorkel in the ocean and they’re drunk at the bar. (Or maybe you’re the other person in this scenario…stay with me) Either way, somehow this wonderful person you adore has become the biggest trip nightmare.

Instead you want someone who at the end of a long trip, when neither of you has showered nearly enough, and you’ve both made some questionable choices when its 2am and you’ve got your beer goggles firmly attached; still likes you. Even though you SHOULD be sick of each other; you both dissolve into giggles at the slightest mention of your ridiculous adventures.

Chakrya is that person for me. We’ve been to Boston, New York, San Francisco, London

Chak does NOT appreciate lines for bathrooms

and Paris together. If I was writing a travel resume, I’d list her as my main reference. No one gets me and my travel bug like she does. I can count on her, when I’m having a bad day to text me with something along the lines of “Tickets to London are $450!” and just like that we’re preparing for an adventure. We haven’t met a cheap ticket we didn’t love.

The thing is, I don’t think everyone has a travel partner like that, and it’s too bad. Obviously not everyone is into the idea that they need to travel. Some have no interest in traveling with anyone. Some people are perfectly content to limit their travel to only what has only been (and always will be) in their comfort zone. I know a guy that goes to Reno, on the same flights, stays at the same resort, in the same room for every trip. And the thing is, he get just as excited about those trips as I do about 10 days in Europe with nothing but a return ticket holding me back. So, to each their own, but if you travel, you owe to yourself to really look and find someone who enhances your experience. Travel is a once-in-a-lifetime experience and having someone to share those moments with is an important part synthesizing the whole experience.

Because at the end of the day it’s not about the places you’ve been, or the things you’ve seen; it’s about the people that you choose to share it with that make the trip worth remembering.

At the beginning…

A pictoral representation of why I can't be taken seriously.

Hello Blog World,

Hey, better late than never, right? What can I say, I’m a little resistant to new social media; not because I don’t see the merit, but because it’s another things I’ll feel obligated to stay on top of. Which is tough. Like a part time job. And I already have a full time job that keeps me pretty busy. But here goes nothing!

But why blog? Why now? I’m not really sure… I guess I’m into that whole navel-gazing thing my generation has going for it. This time I’m not limited to a 140 character limit. #omg #sohard. A little self reflection with an audience to boot. Or maybe an audience; maybe I’ll have to beg my mom to follow it just so it gets some love.

On second thought, that’s a terrible idea. (sorry mom)

The other question is: what the hell am I going to blog about? I’m not entirely sure. But I feel like these things tend to grow organically into what they are meant to be. Like my twitter, I wasn’t sure where I was going with it, but it’s become mostly travel related with a bit of Seattle love thrown in. (oh, and me retweeting things in a futile effort to win stuff…sorry)

So we’ll see where this goes. Hopefully it goes somewhere, and I don’t abandon it in a month or two when the new & shiny has worn off.

PS. Suggestions and welcomes are…well…welcome!